Time for a bit of an update.
Since I last wrote I’ve joined a new gym. This is as well as training with Chris once a week.
At first I thought it would be ok as I’d got over my initial, total fear of going to a gym with plenty of encouragement from Chris. So maybe I had gotten complacent. Well, in order to bring me back down to earth with a bang, last week served up a nasty dose of reality!
Joining the new gym was exciting with it’s pretty spa area, healthy cafe space and ridiculously spacious changing rooms. All that before you reach the seemingly neverending array of shiny new machines and equipment to try out. So, as you can see, I was distracted. All of my previous self doubt, anxiety and fear seemed to have disappeared. Hallelujah, I thought. Maybe I’ve broken the spell. Maybe it’s not as bad as I first thought, PC (that’s pre Chris!). Unfortunately not. Last week I decided to let the negative thoughts rush back in, knocking me for six and filling me with the most overwhelming desire to head for the hills and never return. I know how over the top that sounds but it’s true. In fact, I spent a good part of last Friday night and Saturday morning crying. I feel so silly actually admitting that, but it’s the truth. I suppose I just had a bit of a ‘feeling very sorry for myself’ episode. I felt intimidated by all the extremely fit and beautiful looking people, and I decided to let that get to me. I decided to take it personally and use it as another reason to justify me not sticking to the routine. I mean, I’ll never look like them so what’s the point, right?
Well, thankfully, after a couple of days of hiding away, I went back today for another go at getting back into a fitness routine, and it was OK. I mean, I’ve seen more naked breasts in the last week than I think I ever have, but to be fair if I looked like the women in the changing room I’d probably strut around semi naked too. Maybe that can be a future goal…!
But seriously, yes it’s hard, and sweaty, and painstakingly slow in terms of progress. BUT…I’m not giving up. If really appreciate your encouragement and support with this as I do struggle. I do have wobbles, and I don’t just mean my stomach and thighs! So, yes, be my cheerleaders, please!