Hello everyone. I hope you are well and looking forward to the weekend!
So I’ve unfortunately been a bit of a miserable cow for the past couple of days. I’m not totally sure what caused it, but after talking to a few very good friends I realise that the more negative I am, the worse the feeling gets. I know that probably sounds really obvious, but 1 I can be pretty thick sometimes, and 2 it’s not as simple as ‘just snapping out of it’.
Have you ever had that awful sinking feeling, where nothing seems worth the effort? Almost as though there’s a real heaviness hanging over you and it’s too much like hard work to even make conversation?
Well that’s what it’s been like for me recently. As I’ve said before I sometimes get a bit cocky with myself if I’ve had a good run of a week or three where I’ve felt OK, so every time anything even a little negative happens I feel as though I have a huge setback, like a mini freak out.
Does that make sense to anyone??
Maybe it’s OK to sometimes ‘be in the moment’, even if it’s a negative one?
Maybe it’s OK to have a bit of a cry either out of sadness, or frustration, or both?
Maybe just accepting rather than fighting against it and chastising yourself for feeling that way is alright.
At the end of the day whose place is it to judge you for how you are feeling? Having a bad day, or few days, doesn’t give anyone the right to judge you for it. They are YOUR feelings so go with it. I think I am finally starting to learn this. It’s taken a while, but again maybe that’s what needs to happen in order for it to really hit home.
(*Thank you to Emma for the lovely quotes!)
I also know I am way too hard on myself, but that is something that is going to take a lot longer to change. It’s a routine, even if not a great one, and the idea of breaking it makes me anxious! However, routines can be modified and rules can be broken. It’s all about changing your perspective, looking at things from another point of view. I have learned this after a good CBT session this week. I’m actually quite sad that those sessions are almost over. It took me a while to get used to the idea of talking to someone about the swirling issues in my head, but I have found it really useful. Having a totally objective opinion on things really opens your eyes and, for me, has been a real learning curve, and one I am very thankful for.
So let’s end on a positive!
I wrote a piece this week for Huffington Post UK Lifestyle giving my opinion on the way in which the media stereotypes PCOS and doctors generally don’t know enough to help those suffering with it.
I would really appreciate your feedback on the post, and suggestions for any other areas of PCOS/anxiety/self-esteem you would like to see written about.
I really do want to raise awareness of the importance of these issues in order to help as many women as possible, and that is where YOU can get involved.
Leave a comment below or feel free to send me an e-mail